Life Goes On

My father used to always say, and he may have borrowed this quote from someone else as he was known to do,  that the first thing he did in the morning was to check the obituaries in the newspaper to see if his name was in there, this way he knew if he should go back to bed or not. My mother on the other hand would always read them to see if anyone she knew had passed on.


I remember my mother would say to my father, "Did you know so and so", and my father, whether he knew the person or not would always say no. My mother would then say "Well she or he died." My mother and father didn't always talk a lot, not sure why, they both read a lot although I never recall them discussing anything they read with each other.

They communicated in other ways. I guess we never realized how much they loved each other and depended on each other until my mother left us and we saw the change in my Dad. He did everything for my mother, she never drove, although she had a license for almost 60 years, so he took her everywhere, complaining all the time, yet, he wouldn't have it any other way. No matter what trials and tribulations they went through, they loved each other through it all.

So why am I bringing this up? Lately I have been thinking about those in my life who are either no longer with us or who are probably not going to be here much longer. See, this is what happens when you live in a house that has always been in the family, which the little house on the lake is. My eldest living relative, my father's brother, is not doing well health or mentally wise, he and his wife usually spend the summer next door to me in their summer camp, the original camp (well not the original, but the one I remember as being original), this year they haven't come up. I look outside to the dark windows and I realize time marches on, things change, and evolve.

This past weekend we visited another Aunt and Uncle, my father's sister. This is a couple, while similar to my mom and dad, who , at least when I saw them, always talked together. I have always admired what I have always perceived as a great relationship between the two of them. This is how I picture my life with the woman of my dreams who shares the little house on the lake with me. They are the couple who most depicts to me how I want my life to be, how I want to grow old with my love. Unfortunately, my uncle had a stroke and can no longer talk. He is still mentally sharp and looks healthy, he just can't speak. I was quite sad when we left there on Sunday.

I thought what a shame it was they could no longer talk about everything they used to, how they couldn't share their thoughts. But then I realized they can and still do. They have known each other for so long, my aunt knows exactly what my uncle is trying to say. He uses his hands to communicate and she understands. I guess this is what love is, knowing your partner just by their looks, their gestures, their eyes and their smiles. The truly sad thing is, I guess he was having small, progressive strokes, for some time and he was never diagnosed properly. If he had been, they could have prevented this whole thing.

But life goes on I guess, we can't go back, only forward.
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One Response to this post

  1. Nick DaDalt on August 26, 2010 at 6:54 PM

    Very thoughtful post, Paul. I enjoyed it. My wife and I too have the little house on the (other) lake that has been in my family for many years. I do a lot of thinking at home.

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